Monday, April 13, 2009

How,

How is it that I can let go of someone because of who they are ? Does that make sense ? Just because the way he is, I feel like I can't do anything, I try everything, or ALMOST everything, just to get away from HIM. I don't know what to do anymore. We've already came SO CLOSE to our ending, and sometimes when I thought it was officially done. But no, I was wrong, as always, as every other ending. I'm tired of what I'm going through, and I can't wait till my fuse to blow, because then I'll have the strength to just say it in his face, and I won't have any regrets at all. I feel nothing, nothing at all. We both have seperate minds, both with different thoughts and feelings. I've seen myself going through another path a LONG time ago, but if it wasn't for how he is and what we have/had, I would've been gone a couple steps back. But here I am, still in this stupid hole, trapped, no where to go, but to go with the flow. What am I to do ? I want to love you, to have those feelings like before, but I just can't. Its not there anymore...But you want to deny that, because I know realize it too. I always give you what you want, just to make YOU happy, but I can't have what I want, or anything to make me happy, because all I wanted was for you to understand me and let me be, but you won't let that happen, by all means, you'll keep me in your little hole for as long as I can go. You kept me for too long, that you've become selfish and never wanted to let me go. But as time comes, I'll won't take your crap any longer.

Btw, don't worry Best. I got it, don't worry about me with this situation, I don't want you worrying about me. These situations are just stuff I needa handle on my own, I'll take care of it sooner or later, when the time comes. Thanks for the advice though and what not.

Blaaaaah, enough about this though.

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